Lay

Lay it all on me
The blows and shrieks
The passive aggressive the weak
Lay it all on me
How I made you do it
How if the shoe fits
Lay it on me
What you didn’t say
What you forgot to relay
Lay it all on me
The stagnant guilt
Stained sheets and quilt
Lay it all on me
The wayward looks
The transgressions the fucks
Lay it all on me
Lay it all on me
Or just lay with me
And all is forgiven.

The Weight

The weight
that is what breaks the moment
a reality quilt that although lighter
is heavier than the fiction of your presence,
that rests gently on my skin
where your hands should grip,
that dips between my hips
where your mouth should be,
that brings warmth
where you should breathe.
I pull the quilt tighter,
hoping to fool my mind
to let me let you in again,
but feathers prick and the rustle
no longer sounds like your satisfaction.
And I awake
cold
alone
waiting.

Your Hand

In my hand
the crevices I cultivate from its curve,
the texture of palm to skin,
I find empty space
where you were last
where you were tasked
with seducing the thoughts
I keep hidden
to cum into the light and be seen
a scene imprinted like fingerprinted
cards that hold the crimes committed
that informed the wrong mouth
of the hip it curved
the body it positively perved on
played on
pluralised upon in
gasp
groan
getting closer to a place too hard
to forget.
I stare at this empty space
wonder how sense memory
can hold it tighter than truth
can bring a flashback
of bent forward and arched back
How it has that power
to throwback to the hour
it started
smarted my lips
with first kiss and drawn out bliss
until all that was left
were bruises to press again later
I stare at it idly
blindly serving the recollection
servant to its thrall.
But fuck it all.
What’s the point of empty hands
of clean skin
of scentless sheets
of sound without Oh God Oh Fuck Touch it?
What’s the point in putting fingers
to lips
sliding down hips
slipping into places
sacred spaces
just to pull it forward for a moment?
In my hand – I find empty space.

Parted

Your mouth
all of its promise and its withheld secrets
all of its time taken to taste
this
flesh
All of the ways in which I see it revolve
the words you use
the way you say my name

Your mouth is danger
illicit
complicit
complicated and confiscated
from my own
ready
waiting
eager mouth

The smile it stretches
when a secret is shared
when it’s on skin laid bare
when it tells me lies

About possibility
lacking probability
slacking from productivity

Your mouth is a no-go zone for me
it knows my down low
my sounded
searing
sighs

It knows how to move me
how to control me
console me
now its stole me
my attention
my reiteration
of bitten lip
sucked on tongue
teased out fantasy

Your mouth

Your mouth

Your mouth!

I cannot separate you from it
cannot dissipate my focus from it
to navigate
to hesitate
for more than a second
for more than a…

Your

god

damned

mouth.